


Remember, It’s A Wonderful Life (Christmas With Me)

by Grumblinggay



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F, Old Flames, Parent Tobin, childhood best friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-03
Updated: 2019-12-03
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:48:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21657826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grumblinggay/pseuds/Grumblinggay
Summary: Christen returns to her hometown just before Christmas. Although Moving back wasn’t in her plans, a few people remind her what the season is all about, and she realizes falling back in love is easier than you think.
Relationships: Tobin Heath/Christen Press
Comments: 23
Kudos: 300





	Remember, It’s A Wonderful Life (Christmas With Me)

**Author's Note:**

> This was what I started when I was dead stuck with writing PR. The title is also the song that is sung in this fic. It’s called Christmas With You by Cocheren and Co. and I suggest giving it a listen. Per usual I have a playlist to go with this I’ll link it here and I really hope you guys enjoy this holiday one shot. Comment and kudos always welcome and usually encouraged! 
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/user/tamerasaul/playlist/0ALXVr2IFln5ylzA5fUuJ3?si=eQpOKmSvTxaa46RF09noWA

“Hey, Nancy thanks for the donuts today they were fantastic! You know you are my favorite charge nurse”

The older nurse looked unamused up at Tobin who was leaning over the desk scrolling across an iPad now avoiding eye contact after her over enthusiastic compliments.

“What do you want Doctor Heath.”

Tobin looks up to give her that charming megawatt smile. 

“ Stop smiling at me and just tell me before I say no”

“Okay so I have like 25 minutes left in my shift but things are, ya know” Tobin tries to imply it’s slow in the emergency department but knows better than to curse herself by saying it out loud.

“So I promised D.H. we would finally get a tree today, so I thought I would scoop her out of the daycare early and we could head out” She ended her statement with some uncertainty in her voice knowing it would be completely up to the nurse if she was willing to delegate any new patients to other doctors to cover for her. Before Nancy the charge nurse could answer though, one of the ED nurses calls Tobin from down the hall near the triage doors. 

“Hey Doctor Heath, we’ve got a patient in triage who needs stitches could you please?”

Tobin huffs looking at Nancy who has a slightly smug smirk on her face as she starts typing on her computer. She walks away turning the iPad off and rolling her eyes walking towards triage. 

“I am on my way”

  
  


She walks into the room only looking up long enough to catch a small glimpse of the woman sitting on the edge of the bed holding a gauze wrapped ice pack to her hairline above her right eye. She walks over to pull some gloves on to her hands and pulls out a small suture kit from the supply cart in the room. 

“Hey there, I am Doctor Heath let’s take a look at what you’ve got there” 

Tobin stops mid stride as she slides her chair across the room towards the bed away from the cart with her tray of supplies. 

“Oh my gosh Tobin, is it that bad? Should I ask for a plastic surgeon instead” 

The Doctor shakes her head out of her stupor before making her best attempt at calming the woman. “ Christen Press, I’ll be damned” Tobin says softly with some surprise in her voice.

“Toby”

“Hey only one lady is allowed to call me that now” Christen doesn’t realize that she cringes a little. 

“and No it’s not bad at all. I say six, maybe eight stitches. Gosh, I didn’t know you were back in town, here for the holidays?” 

“Nope, I’m here to be here” Christen says with a sharpness in her tone that tells Tobin she doesn’t want to actually be here. That’s why she moved to the city Tobin thinks to herself.

“Not taking over your old man’s job are you, cause I just got myself on his short list don’t need to go impressing anymore Press’s do I?” Tobin jokes making Christen smile just a little.

“No, No way. He can run this hospital until the world ends and I’d never want it, but I did accept his nagging offer to join the legal team. And don’t kid yourself Tobin, he has always loved you. You could have failed out of med school and he would have found a job for you here anyway”

“Yeah maybe but I would have never failed out of Med School” Tobin plays it off a little trying to hide the slight blush to her face.. “So uh city life just not your style then?” Tobin is still joking but she can tell Christen just isn’t quite in the mood. “How’d this happen anyway?” Tobin asks point at her forehead.

“I slipped on some ice”

The doctor gives her a look encouraging her to elaborate. 

“Walking out of my Dad’s house, I slipped on a patch of ice on the driveway”. 

“In those heels” Tobins asks getting a shameful nod from Christen... Tobin is being playful with her as she finishes wiping away some dry blood from her forehead. The woman in front of her winces. “So sorry, I promise I am going to numb that right up for you” she flashes her a smile before turning to grab the syringe. “ You know, after all the winters you spent here you’d think you would know to be more cautious about the ice”

“How is that starting to feel?” Tobin asks when Christen doesn’t respond. 

“Pretty numb” Christen says confidently.

“Good these stitches will only take a minute or two and you can be on your way. You will need to either come back here, or see your primary to have them removed in about five days. I wouldn’t mind taking them out for you though” 

Christen thinks Tobin is being flirtatious now and if she were any other patient she would probably be slightly offended at the unprofessionalism. But it’s Tobin. And no matter how many years it’s been, that megawatt smile just does something to her she has never, and will never be able to explain. 

“That soon?”

“Yeah people always seem to be surprised at how quickly they can have their stitches removed.”

  
  
  


Tobin glances down from where she is working, to look at the beautiful green eyes that captivated her earlier. Tobin finishes placing a small bandage over the area and scoots back to put some distance now between her and Christen. 

  
  


She stands and disposes of the supplies into their appropriate places before taking her gloves off and disposing of them as well before grabbing the device she had placed on the counter upon entering the room. Before she can turn to sit down again through the door to the treatment room swings open. A small child with brown braided hair comes barrelling in with a giant winter coat on and a backpack tightly strapped to her back. 

“D.H. what are you doing in here?”

Before the child can answer though a nurse comes running into the room behind her. “I am so sorry Tobin. We were walking down together to find you for the end of your shift and she asked where you were and Nancy told her and she took off.” Tobin looks over to the young girl and gives her a disapproving look. “Sorry Toby, I thought you were done working”

“It’s totally okay, I think we were done here anyway right, Toby” Christen speaks up understanding more now about her earlier statement.

The smiling child stops in front of Christen though, mouth agape. 

“Whoa, you are so pretty” 

“Eleanor Drew” Tobin chides trying not to raise her voice. Before she can reel the unraveling situation though, Christen takes things into her own hands. 

“Thank you, that is very kind of you.” Christen says grabbing the child’s attention completely. 

“I’m Ellie or Eleanor Drew, or if you’re Toby, D.H. which stands for Drew Heath but I don’t go by that, just D.H. but also most people call me Ellie. What’s your name?” Christen can’t help but giggle at the child’s antics.

“I’m Christen and it’s very nice to meet you, Ellie” 

Christen looks to Tobin who is leaning her head into her hand that is propped up on the counter. She looks defeated, almost as if this is common place for the child. When Tobin makes eye contact with Christen she finally clears her throat. 

“I am really sorry about this, it was very unprofessional and some of us know better don’t we”

Ellie looks to Tobin and then bows her head knowing her behavior wasn’t appropriate. 

“I’m sorry, Christen” She apologizes without Tobin actually having to direct her. 

“It really was okay, meeting you actually made me feel a lot better Miss Ellie” The child perks up and beams at Christen. “And thank you again, Tobin. I appreciate everything. See you around?”

“ 5 pm next Thursday, if that works?”

Christen nods at her and flashes her a smile before turning to the child and offering the same smile. 

Christen has already grabbed her bags from their place on the bed behind her and put her coat back on ready to leave. Christen says goodbye to Ellie who just waves from her spot next to Tobin now. Just as she slips out of the room into the hall though she hears the child speak again. 

“She was so pretty Toby did you see how pretty she was”

Christen feels herself blush again, not allowing herself to think about what Tobin might have said back. 

  
  


Early Saturday morning Christen finds herself relieved that her first full week of work at her new job is over. Being the new employee has come with some territory she isn't the biggest fan of. Including working late hours. Taking over for another lawyer who left the hospital board, as well as leaving behind a heap of cases that haven't been processed or filed.. 

  
  
  


Christen is walking around the grocery store just after 8 am when she hears a slightly familiar voice. 

“Toby this is so heavy!”

“You volunteered to carry it DH. You committed and I won't bail you out”

Christen sees Tobin walk passed the child. All she can make out of her though is a black beanie slowly making its way around the aisle as Tobin sets an item in the grocery cart.

“Oh stop grumbling and give it to me’ Tobin finally gives in taking some item from the child who leans over on the cart dramatically exasperated. Christen is still looking on as she catches Ellie’s attention and the child jumps from her seat. 

“Christen!” she yells running over to hug the woman, who she barely knows. 

“DH!” Tobin is yelling and starting for the child before she sees who it is. “Dude, you cannot keep running off from people no matter who you are with, or where you are okay?”

“I’m sorry, Toby.” The child steps a little closer to Tobin looking up at her and then looking at Christen “Toby it’s Christen, remember?” she says in a whisper but no one else is around so Christen hears her. 

“Hi, Tobin”

“Hi Chris” Tobin says in that gentle way she always manages to say Christens name and Christen wants to allow herself to melt over it but she can't. She doesn’t know this woman standing in front of her anymore. It’s been years since they’ve talked for more than just a few minutes at some holiday party when she had been in town. 

“Christen guess what we are doing today?” 

Tobin internally thanks the kid for coming in clutch when her brain was blanking on how to keep talking.

“What is that, Ellie?”

“We are finally getting a Christmas Tree! It’s our first real Christmas and Toby promised we would get a real tree and decorate it and make those thingys you hang on them, I can’t say the word right so I just let her do it for me” she said pointing to Tobin. 

“Ornaments?” Christen offers to the child who nods and continues to ramble on a little more while Tobin grabs something else from a nearby shelf. Ellie suddenly remembers something on their list and asks Tobin if she can grab it from its place in their aisle. 

“I am so sorry about her. She is truly excited about life, she isn’t always like this.. We are however working on some social skills but I think it might be the only thing she isn’t good at. She’s only five but I swear she talks to me sometimes like she's an adult. Blows me away.”

“She is very intelligent for a five year old” Christen smiles as they both look over to where she is diligently deciding on which box to grab from the shelf.. 

“So when did you--” she trails off not finishing her question but knowing Tobin knew where she was gong. 

“ I adopted her about a year ago. She came in to the hospital with her foster parents when she was three, I was still in my residency and on a pediatric rotation. I spent everyday for two weeks with her while she fought off a nasty virus. Poor kid didn't hardly eat for over a week. We couldn’t figure out what was wrong with her. She was the best part of my day though, I mean through everything she went through, she was still so happy. And so curious, I mean about everything. I never answered so many questions in my life. A few months later I ran into her foster parents again, you know small town and all,, it was then the idea of adopting her dawned on me. I was just a few weeks out from becoming an attending at the hospital, it had just been me by myself for so long.”

Christen doesn’t miss the drop in Tobin’s voice. She feels a small wave of guilt but focuses back on what she is saying.

“ It wasn’t easy, the process. Being single and a doctor who works crazy hours, a judge isn’t super keen on letting such a young child go to a home that isn't what they consider established or stable. Took almost a year to prove I could provide what she needed. So this is our first Christmas.” 

“I had no idea, Dad never told me. I guess I don’t keep up with anyone else from around here.” 

“Small college town life wasn’t what you were built for Chris, no one blames you for that.”

What Tobin doesn't know, is the weight those words hold, or she does and she is hoping Christen understands. No one blames her, or that she doesn’t blame her. She knows if she keeps running into Tobin, which she will. They will eventually talk about their past. She isn’t sure what that will be like. 

“How are your stitches holding up” Tobin asks brushing the hair away from Christens forehead almost instinctively to look at the injury, not even pausing to flinch at how comfortable just made herself in Christen’s personal space. 

“Well it only hurts sometimes but it looks like it's doing okay. I think you did a pretty good job on them, doc” 

“You’ve got quite a bit of bruising, have you been icing it at all” Tobin’s demeanor has changed almost completely from playful to concerned doctor. By the guilty look on Christens face she guesses that she hasn’t iced it at all. “Chris, you’ve gotta ice it, it will help with the healing, and give you a less noticeable scar.”

Christen didn’t miss the way Tobin just let herself into her personal space. She also doesn’t miss how it hadn’t made her feel uncomfortable at all, she had definitely blushed a little though. She promises to ice it as soon as she gets home and that promise seems to placate Tobin’s worries. 

Ellie quietly makes her way to Tobin’s side wrapping her arms around her torso and leaning against her.

“What’s up, bud?” 

“Is it nap time, Toby.? I am hungry”

The two women laugh at the question and statement from the child. 

“It is actually almost time for lunch and then nap time okay?”

“Okay, can we get those chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs?” Ellie asks as both women have started pushing their carts together down another aisle. 

“Yup, you remember which side they're on” Tobin asks and watches as Ellie points to the frozen side of the aisle and Tobin allows her to go retrieve them. 

“So why DH?” Christen asks suddenly

“Oh, it’s kind of silly. When I first got Ellie she was learning how to write her name. The kid could not for the life of her write an E. I mean she had every other letter down pat but I could never understand what is was about the letter E. The upper case would have too few protrusions or too many, never three. And her lower case looked like o’s. So I told her she could just write DH until she could get her E’s down. That way her teacher still knew her work was her’s. I swear as soon as i gave her permission to do that she figured out how to write and E. So DH is just a nickname. I still call her Ellie most days. She came up with Toby before she ever heard anyone say it, which I’m not a big fan of as a nickname” Tobin says side eyeing the woman who had been calling her that since they were kids. “but that kid could call me whatever she wanted honestly.” 

“Got em” Ellie yells from down the aisle holding a bag half the size of her body trying to run with it back to the grocery cart. 

“Hey Tobin?” Ellie asks and Tobin knows it's serious because that's the only time she uses Tobin’s actual name. “ Can Christen come with us to get a Christmas Tree?”

Tobin looks up at Christen who looks a little shocked at the question. 

“ I wouldn’t want to intrude” She offers but Tobin shuts it down quickly.

“Ah you wouldn’t be, we would love to have you, we are making hot chocolate afterwards”

Christen wants to argue that she really is okay passing on the ivitation but she also knows with Tobin, it’s a losing battle. 

“Text me the time and I can meet you guys there”

“Nonsense, Ellie and I will pick you up!” 

Christen rolls her eyes but doesn’t give any push back. Alright well let me get my grocery shopping done so I can be prepared to go cut down a Christmas tree”

“Let’s say 2?”

Christen agrees on the time arrangement and watches and Tobin and the child makes their way towards the check out line. She thinks for a moment that maybe agreeing to this was a mistake, but she also thinks that maybe these hesitancies she suddenly feels around Tobin are completely one sided. 

***

Christen are Ellie are standing about ten feet back from Tobin’s SUV watching the woman struggle to strap the tree down herself. Although the guy at the tree farm offered to help she insisted on being about to it herself. Even Christen had offered but she refused. 

Stubborn is what Christen thought. Same old Tobin. Stubborn. 

So here they were, her and this five year old girl both bundled up in winter coats and beanies with their hands in their pockets watching as Tobin struggled. It only took a few more minutes before she hops down and claims victory. 

“I just hope it doesn’t fall off while we drive” Ellie says making her way back to the car leaving Tobin’s jaw open looking completely offended and Christen standing there in a fit of giggles. 

“Can you believe her?”

“Actually I can, that took you entirely too long, I’m not sure if I should be confident it’s never coming off or scared it’s going to fall right off.”

‘Wow, does no one have confidence in me?” 

They all climb into the car ready to turn the heat up, heading back to Tobin’s parents house. 

“So we are staying with my parents while I have the house finished up.”

“House?” Christen questions. She realizes she really doesn’t know much about the woman next to her anymore. It had been nearly ten years since they probably  _ really _ knew each other. 

“Yeah, I bought some property off the lake, it was actually surprisingly cheap but, college town and all, so I bought the land during med school and before I finished I had some plans drawn up, hired a few people and now it’s almost done. We were hoping to be moved in by Christmas but they promised before the new year. Waiting on some electrical stuff and then an inspection. I’d love to take you over to see it sometime”

“Yeah that’d be nice” Christen thinks trying to fight off those feelings again of uncertainty. The problem is, Tobin used to be her best friend. When Christen’s Dad bought the hospital her whole family up and moved here. Not something a kid in middle school wants to do, move to a college town in the middle of nowhere, where she knows no one. On the first day though, Tobin sat next to her in her first period, ignoring the assigned seating in the class, and never left her side after that. They started dating when they were 15, becoming more inseparable if that were possible. So at the end of their senior year, they made the decision that even though they would be going to colleges on opposite sides of the country they would stay together.

Tobin gave her some convincing speech on graduation night that made her feel like they could get through anything, even the distance. So they gave it a go. Their first year wasn't too bad. They skype called everyday even if it just meant they sat on the other end studying individually. When they both came home for the summer it felt like they really could make it all work. 

Sophomore year got harder. When Tobin decided on going to med school, that meant her studies nearly doubled. Christen felt the distance starting to break them a little. She remembers Tobin being unconvinced though and flying all the way to California just to spend a weekend with her. 

The following summer they agreed that for the time being they would remain friends. Tobin told her she would always be in love with her and Christen remembers crying the entire flight back to California. The first few weeks they talked as often as they always did but eventually phone calls became scarce and texts went unanswered on both ends. 

When Christen was home for Christmas that year Tobin had gotten drunk and spent their night together listing all the reasons why they should still be together. Christen gave in that night, but Tobin didn’t hear from her again for months after that. She attended Tobin’s College Graduation, after all they had been best friends for nearly ten years. Christen knows she wouldn’t have missed it for the world. She also knew that was just the start of them falling out. She had broken Tobin’s heart, and she couldn’t keep facing that. She started Law School the same Summer Tobin started Med school. On opposites sides of the country they had both started new lives. 

Since then all she knew of Tobin was what few things her Dad would mention, and the once or twice a year they ran into each other while Christen was in town visiting. Here they were nearly twenty years after they had first met, and she couldn’t explain how this woman next to her could feel so forgien yet so familiar. 

****

Christen is sitting on the couch in the basement of Tobin’s parents home. A basement that was in and of itself a house. It has two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a kitchen, dining room, living room, and a study. It was where Tobin had moved into once she got into Med School. And where she and Ellie had moved into after she had adopted her. 

She is sipping on her hot chocolate watching as Tobin teaches the child how to properly wrap christmas lights around a tree. Something she notices is how patient Tobin is with her. Ellie is full of energy, and as a result seemed to have a hard time being patient with how things had to be done. Tobin doesn’t ever falter though, never getting frustrated or impatient. 

Once the lights are done they grab the box of Ornaments and the few that Ellie had made with Christen while Tobin got the tree set up in the stand, by herself, of course. 

“Hey DH, let’s hang these ornaments first and then we can hang all the ones you made okay? 

“Okay!” The child says agreeing in excitement just to be decorating a tree. 

“You know Christmas is in just over a week, why did you wait so long to get a tree?” Christen asks from her spot on the couch.

“We were suppose to get one last weekend, but I got called into the hospital, and everyday after work it’s just been too hectic.” she admits guiltily knowing how much the child had been wanting to get one. 

‘Hey Ash texted me this morning?” Tobin changes the subject as she hangs some ornaments near the top of the tree where Ellie can’t reach. She also checks to see if the child is listening in on their conversation, but she is humming along to the christmas music they had put on. 

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah said she spotted us in the store together this morning”

Christen groans but doesn’t respond, she already knows where this is going. Sure the town wasn’t necessarily a small town, but it was a college town and anyone who wasn’t there for school had been in the town for sometime. Which meant anywhere you went, you ran into at least one person you knew. 

“I am sure you can guess the questions she had for me?”

Christen thinks this might be it but she knows Tobin wouldn’t have this conversation with a five year old in the room. A five year old who she is the parent of now and all she had known of Tobin, is a single Tobin. Or at least that’s what she assumes. 

“I’m sure I could” Christen responds finishing off the drink in her hand. 

“She did ask one question though I couldn’t answer for myself, a question I actually had too”

Tobin stops to look over at Christen to gauge her reaction before continuing her work on the tree. 

“She wanted to know how your fiance was?”

Christen feels her face flush red and her stomach drop. Because of course everyone she went to high school with knew about that. 

“Uhh married to someone else” Christen says matter of factly and gets up to place her dish in the sink not making eye contact with Tobin who had nearly dropped the decorations in her hand after hearing Christen’s words. 

“I’m sorry, Chris I didn't mean to”

‘No no Tobin it’s fine. I called it off, not her. I guess some people just don’t recognize when they’re in love with their best friend. It was amicable no worries”

“Well if it is any consolation, she really missed out” Tobin gives her a wink and then places the empty boxes aside. “Hey, Ellie would you like to go get your ornaments and hang them now?”

She jumps up from her spot on the carpet where she was still hanging some of the glass ornaments Tobin had allowed her to hang, running to grab the two that she had decorated herself. 

The first was just her hand print with the year under it and her initials next to the date. Properly written EDH. Tobin smiles as they found a spot together to hang it. When Tobin gets a look at the second one she makes an audible noise she couldn't even describe, alerting Christen. But when Tobin doesn’t immediately respond Ellie does. 

“Are you okay, Toby?”

“Yeah Eleanor Drew I’m okay” Tobin says trying to hide the emotion in her voice. 

“Are you sure, you called me Eleanor Drew. You only call me that when I’m in trouble.” The child’s face was more startled than anything. Tobin wrapped her up in her arms from the place where she had been down on one knee in front of the tree. “I just love you a lot, that’s all”

“I love you too, Toby” 

The child feigned content but Tobin could tell.

“Hey let's find a special spot for this one okay?” Tobin lifted her up so she could hand it higher on the tree wherever she wanted. 

Christen watched the scene play out in front of her as she leaned on the couch. She didn’t miss the way Tobin wiped away tears before Ellie could notice. When she put the kid down she directed her to help clean up the mess she had made. Christen pitched in and after a few minutes the tree was lit up and all evidence of the disaster from setting it up was gone. 

“Hey Ellie, I’m gonna go out for a little bit later would you be okay eating dinner with Grandma and Grandpa, they can read you your favorite night time story and if you want to sleep upstairs tonight you can?” Tobin asked as she bent down to get eye level with the child. 

“Can we have a popcorn movie night after dinner?”

“I think they would love to have a popcorn movie night with you kiddo”

Tobin watched her celebrate in excitement before the two of them excused themselves to grab a pair of pajamas for the kid. Christen took the moment alone to step closer to the tree. Spotting the ornament the two had hung last. 

It’s frame was made of popsicle sticks. Christen guesses she made this one at school by how well it was crafted compared to the one that she had helped the child with. In the middle was a picture of the two of them. Christ thinks it’s an older picture because Ellie looks just a little bit smaller. She is sitting on Tobins knee with Tobin’s arms wrapped around her. They’re both smiling as if they had just been laughing. Under the picture on the frame in child like handwriting are the words that Christen knows are responsible for the way Tobin reacted earlier. 

_ Mommy and Ellie Christmas 2019 _

Christen feels the air leave her chest. It’s without a doubt she understands that must have been the first time the child ever called her that. Even if wasn’t verbally. She can feel her own tears prick at her eyes and she tries to blink them way slowly. Christen had known Tobin since they were just a couple of twelve year old kids. Maybe they weren’t close anymore, maybe they didn’t know who each other really were anymore, but her heart felt for the woman she had been best friends with, her first love, and really the only person she had ever been in love with. 

She manages to compose herself before the two resurface from the bedroom and they all head upstairs together. 

“Hey Chris, would you want to come with me to grab a bite and maybe a drink?” Tobin has a tone in her voice that is almost pleading, and even if she didn’t. Christen knows she wouldn’t say no. 

****

“This is still the best pizza in the world.” Tobin says as she wipes the corners of her mouth. 

“It’s bar pizza Tobin, it is absolutely NOT the best pizza in the world. You need to get out more” 

“Hey I get out plenty, I still stand by what I said, Best pizza ever” 

Christen rolls her eyes and finishes off another beer. Ordering more for the both of them.

“Whoa there Press that’s a third beer, now I can hold own, but last time I let you drink this much--” Tobin doesn’t finish but just shakes her head smacking her lips. 

“Excuse me you mean the last time you got me drunk? In this very bar if I recall!” 

“It was your twenty first birthday, you were getting drunk with or without me. But maybe I do recall egging you on a little”

Christen shoves her playfully as the bartender returns with their drinks. 

“Well, I didn’t get that drunk, cause I remember that night pretty well” She says cockily sipping her drink a little knowing her face is flush and it’s not just from the alcohol in her system. 

“The whole night?” Tobin asks knowing where this is going. 

“Mhmm”

“I guess I am just that good” she takes a long drink from her beer watching Christen’s mouth open in shock at how forward she had just been. “What? I’m just saying, you remembered it after all those drinks, I guess I shouldn’t be surprised though, the way you were--” Christen reaches over to cup Tobin’s mouth and they both dissolve into a fit of giggles. 

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence, Tobin Heath.

“Why not, I’ve never been known for not finishing things, can’t start now” 

Christen has shake her head and ignores the comment this time. She knows she is digging herself into a deeper hole and her face is certainly beet red at this point. Thankful for the low lights in the bar hiding some of the blush. 

“You haven’t changed at all, and before you make that dirty too, no I don’t need to find out for myself” Christen says knowing exactly what Tobin’s response would be. 

“You might hate this Chris, but you haven’t changed either.” She looks serious now. And little does she know christen doesn’t hate it at all. “Thank you for hanging out with us today. I didn’t realize how much I missed you, and Ellie loved it too. Gosh, she wouldn’t stop talking about you since the other day at the hospital.”

“We only spent like two minutes together!” 

“I know! That kid man, she’s such an amazing enigma. She is smitten with you, and I mean I can’t blame her” Christen can’t rebuttal the remark this time though because there next to her on the barstool was Tobin flashing her that smile that pulls every fiber of her being into her chest lighting every nerve on fire. If she had to explain it that’s how she would. Her heart pulls in her chest everytime, it always has, and after nearly twenty years, she thinks it always will. 

“Do you wanna dance” Tobin suddenly asks catching her off guard a little but she nods in agreement and allows Tobin to lead her to where a few other people are also dancing to the song playing over the speakers softly in the bar. For a Saturday night, it’s not too busy. She thinks she spots a few people she knows but at this point probably couldn’t call out by name. 

  
  


Tobin takes one of her hands in hers and reaches around to wrap her arm around her. Christen lets her head fall to Tobins chest as they sway back and forth to the song. She doesn’t know it but she can hear Tobin singing it under her breath. 

They danced like that for a couple songs before finishing off another drink each. Tobin insists on calling an Uber to take them back to her parents' place. Christen gives in but the thoughts are racing in her head. She doesn’t want this night to end like that last one they had spent at that bar. They weren’t a couple of college kids anymore. They were adults, with real jobs, one of them with a kid. It’s only halfway through the ride back she realizes Tobin has her hand in hers, assuming it’s for comfort more than anything. She went from playful and laid back to quiet and pensive in the car and if there was anyone in the world who could tell something was up with her, it was the woman next to her. 

They walk up the sidewalk to the entrance to the basement on the backside of the house. Christen walks purposefully a few paces in front of Tobin. She stops at the door realizing she doesn’t have a key to get in. Before she turns around though she feels a body press into hers from behind reaching around to unlock the door. She watches Tobin turn the door knob pushing the door open letting her walk in first. 

  
  


“You can stay here tonight if you want. I have extra clothes and I can take Ellie’s bed since she’s upstairs with my parents tonight” it comes out deadpanned. Completely unlike her tone at the bar.

She hears her offer but Tobin started towards the kitchen grabbing a bottle of whiskey and pouring herself a glass never even looking at Christen. There is only the soft glow of the Christmas tree illuminating the room and the light from the kitchen Tobin had turned on and she can’t make out the expression on Tobin’s face. 

“Chris?”

“Uhh yeah that works if it’s not a hassle, I’ll just have to make sure to be out of here before she comes back down”

“Oh… yeah” it comes out barely as a breath and the room fills with silence again. “Can I ask you something?”

Here it comes, this was finally it Christen thinks. She just nods as Tobin walks closer to her slowly.

“It’s been ten damn years, and I think I wonder everyday why we called it quits”

‘Tobin--”

“No Chris, just let me okay, you’ve always done the talking for us, both of us and I think I just always wanted to make sure you were happy I didn’t speak up. Unless I was drunk right? That night on your twenty first, you said you remember everything. So you remember me telling you that I was still in love with you? That I couldn’t move on from that no matter how hard I had tried. Do you remember what you said?”

Christen is frozen in the spot she stand in. Because not only is Tobin inches from her now, but because she does remember everything about that night. She doesn't find the words to respond though. 

“I said that and you said, you were still in love with me too, and that you left because you were afraid I was pulling away and you didn’t want to hurt either of us. And then--”

“And then I left the next morning and didn’t call you for months.” Christen finally admits and she’s sure the words leaving her mouth sobered her up. 

“Yeah, I’ve never been that broken in my life. I managed to get it together before you came home that summer though. I think that in the back of my mind we were gonna figure it out. I just threw myself into school and let it sit dormant for years…., then your dad had announced you were engaged.” Tobin pauses for a moment sucking in a sharp breath “I almost failed one of my boards after that.”

“Tobin that was only--”

“A little over a year ago? Yeah. I had just filed for adoption for Ellie. When I saw you in that procedure room the other day it felt like the world stopped. But I remembered, there was someone else. Today at the grocery store I noticed you weren’t wearing a ring and then Ash sent that text. I had to know, I had to know because I didn’t want to do something… something stupid. And when I asked and you said she was married to someone else I almost felt my heart break for you. Like, how could anyone ever hurt you like that I couldn’t in a million years imagine because for some reason after all this time, after everything we have been through when I’m with you its just I can’t--” Tobin doesn’t finish her sentence though because she hears sob escape Christen and she places her glass down quickly to wrap the woman up. 

She hears a few “I’m sorry’s” through the crying and as intoxicated as she is Tobin can’t help but want to be sober and take it all back. This wasn’t supposed to go like this, it was supposed to be easy again Tobin thought, now she had messed it up. She held Christen until she had fallen asleep on her chest. She doesn’t move her off of her though, she just pulls the blanket off the couch and drapes it over them hoping things would be better in the morning. 

****

Tobin feels something pulling at her shirt a few times but the headache she has is keeping her from entertaining the idea of opening her eyes. She feels the pull again and she remembers, Christen is asleep on her chest and her child is the one standing next to her trying to wake her up silently.

“Toby” Ellie whispers as quietly as possible pulling on her shirt again. 

She opens her eyes turning to look at the young child trying to scramble and idea of how she is going to explain this situation in front of her. 

“Toby, Nana made breakfast and she said to come wake up you and Christen” she whispers again and Tobin realizes that the child is doing her best to not wake Christen up. She also realizes her mom knows that Christen was here. The hole just keeps getting deeper, not to mention the mess she made last night. Groaning quietly she tells Ellie they will be right upstairs before she skips off seemingly unphased by what she had walked downstairs to find. The possibility that her mom telling Ellie thst Christen was here might have lessened the surprise. 

“Hey Chris, Christen honey we gotta get up” Tobin cringes at the words she says before she thinks about it but when the woman on top of her moans in disapproval and cuddles in closer to her.

“Christen, my mom made breakfast and sent Ellie down here to get us.”

Christen sits up enough to look at Tobin before placing her head in her hands. 

“Oh God, what a mess” 

“My sentiments exactly”

Christen moves slow to get off of Tobin but sits on the edge of the couch to stretch when Tobin leans forward to brush her hair off her shoulder. She watches as Christen closes her eyes at the slight contact not moving away, but not leaning in to it either. 

“We should go before she sends your child back down again”

“Yeah, well it’s not the kids questions I’m worried about now”

Christen didn’t seem phased though and Tobin felt completely thrown off after what happened last night. At the bar she felt like they had fallen back into how they had always been. As if the last ten years hadn’t really happened, or they had but it didn’t change anything. Then she had to go and let drunken words make Christen cry. But then they woke up together, and were eating breakfast together. Christen stayed, and she thinks that maybe that's what surprises her the most. Her mom didn’t ask any questions at breakfast and the only questions that threw anyone was Ellie asking bluntly if they loved each other. It happened so nonchalantly Tobin had to ask her to repeat the question, making it more awkward as they finished their food. 

  
  


****

They spent the rest of the week falling back into familiar patterns but skirting around what happened the other night. Never bringing it back up through their texts or the few times they had seen each other throughout the week. When Christen had stopped by the hospital to get her stitches taken out, she accepted an invitation to join her and Ellie at the town’s Christmas festival for Christmas Eve on Saturday. 

“Christen you have not been icing this!” Tobin chastises her playfully a she removes her stitches. 

“Tobin it hurts!” 

“Chris, it doesn’t hurt that bad, I’ve seen you ice injuries you can handle it”

“This one was different’” Christen is basically pouting now and Tobin wants to roll her eyes but instead she bites the inside of her cheek not breaking the eye contact she has with the woman sitting in front of her. She wants to make a joke about kissing it better but she knows that would be going further than they’ve went with their banter this past week. It feels almost normal, almost.

“Ellie would like to know when she will get to see you again, I told her you were just over for sledding yesterday but we would see you Saturday, prematurely assuming you would be joining us for the festival.”

“Guess it’s a good things I said yes then isn’t it?”

“Can you say yes to one more thing?” Tobin asks, flashing  _ that  _ smile. 

Christen shakes her head before encouraging the woman before her to continue. 

“I need to go pick out a bike for her and I could really use your help” 

“Tobin Christmas is in two days and you waited this long?”

“Listen the kid wrote santa a christmas list and Santa lost it, then at breakfast this morning she went on and on about all the things she was hoping for and when she brought up the bike I had completely forgotten, so I didn't have to wait this long. I just forgot.” she shrugs her shoulders like that explanation was satisfactory. 

“I’ll go with you, I am also guessing that I will be helping to assemble this bike?”

She watches as Tobin just smile at her wide before she rolls her eyes and finally get up to get ready to leave. 

“You’re lucky I love you” The words left Christen’s mouth before she realized what she was saying and she felt herself freeze in her spot not facing Tobin, she thanks the heavens. 

  
  


“I am lucky, especially lucky to have my best friend back around” Tobin replies knowing that Christen probably didn’t mean what she said the way it came out. She sees her shoulders relax and lets out a slow breath herself hoping she fixed the situation.

“Me too, Tobs. Really. Coming back here wasn’t really in my plans and you’ve made being back here easy. I just, this isn’t the time to unpack this but I am grateful things between us feel back to normal, I can’t take back the last ten years but--”

“Christen” Tobin says reaching her hand up to brush her hair behind her ear interrupting her in that she has been for the last week now. Knowing exactly what to say before Christen does. “You don't need to take back anything, You’ve been my best friend for nearly twenty years, I don’t think anything is ever going to change that. You’re here now and I am thankful for that. So let’s just be here. In the moment.” 

Christen gives her a tight lipped smile as her own expression softens. They’ve been letting this tension hanging between them and somehow Tobin seemed to ease the pain with just a few words. Because of course that’s how Tobin would handle it. Her anxiety from the other night is still there in the back of her mind but she figures if they need to unpack the past, they will. But right now, she feels good about living in the present. 

****

Christmas Eve came faster than Christen anticipated and she was rushing out of work to make it home in time so that she could get ready for Tobin and Ellie to pick her up. She doesn’t think she has been this excited for Christmas in a long time and she would be lying if she said she 

didn’t feel almost giddy to be spending the festival with the two of them.

The drive to the festival wasn’t long but the three of them spent it belting out their favorite christmas songs in the car, the two adults allowing the five year old to take the lead on her favorite parts. Christen loved how fearless she was, knowing most five year olds would shy away from the spotlight but she figures it has a lot to do with how comfortable Tobin makes sure she always feels. She has watched it happen over and over since meeting the kid. Tobin lets her always say her piece, allowing her to express herself and never making the child feel smaller than anyone else in the room. She makes her feel important and Christen knows that's just a Tobin thing, making people feel like they matter. 

Tobin finds her parents pretty quickly after they arrive and Ellie asks if she can go with them to ride some rides. She allows it but they agree to meet back up for dinner before the talent show.

The two women seperate from Tobin’s parents heading towards where people are selling homemade art and other goods. They walk up and down the aisles, pointing out some interesting items and occasionally making jokes to each other about some of the more odd items. Tobin stops at a booth selling some kind of wood working art looking diligently at one small piece, christen stands next to her and loops her arm around Tobin’s who has her hands in her pockets. 

The woman running the booth turns around looking shocked to see the two women in front of her. “Tobin Heath and Christen Press! Well aren’t you two a sight for sore eyes, I didn’t realize you two were together again” 

Christen feels her face fall and pulls her arm back out of Tobin’s, awkwardly looking everywhere but the woman. “Ha, no Mrs.Lawson, it’s not like that” Tobin says simply as she keeps looking around giving the older woman a smile. Mrs.Lawson was Tobin’s neighbor growing up and she had spent her fair share of time chasing the two of them off in their younger years. The older woman gauffs as if she doesn’t believe them but Tobin just pulls Christen along waving and giving her a quick goodbye. 

“That was awkward” Christen lets outs exasperated and Tobin just lets out a breathy laugh. 

“What?”

“People have been talking Chris, I just, I’m not surprised.”

“Talking? Talking how?”

“We live in a college town where we know half the population, people have seen us together, the same people we grew up with, people talk” she said emphasizing the word talk. “I mean they just assume what anyone would”

“That because we are spending time together, that we  _ are _ together?”

“Chris, even my Mom asked. I’ve set everyone who has asked me straight, I’m just saying you can’t be shocked when people around here start rumors”

“I’m not shocked, I guess I forgot how small this town is.”

Tobin reaches around and wraps her arm around Christen’s shoulders, pulling her closer placing a chaste kiss to the side of her head over the beanie she was wearing. “We’ll set every single one of them straight if you want to, we can ignore them and let them talk, or we can give them something to talk about” she says moving her eyebrows suggestively causing Christen to give her a slight shove but not enough to pull them apart, Tobin’s arm still around her shoulders as they make their way to the pavillion where they agreed to meet up for dinner. 

“I don’t think we need to do anything else for people to keep talking, Tobs”

“You’re probably right about that, I’d be fun to keep em talking though wouldn’t it?”

She pulls away walking backwards away from her though waiting for Christen’s response, knowing she probably won’t get one. 

“DH! Did Nana and Pops allow you to order your own food?” Tobin asks sliding in next to the five year old with her own plate full of food from one of the food trucks. The child’s plate had a slice of pizza on it and that was it. She watches as the tiny brunette smiles and nods her head eagerly. Tobin leans down and places a kiss to the top of her head. 

They all eat together laughing and joking around, sharing stories about their childhood, with Ellie . Tobin gets lost in the conversation and forgets that her and Ellie had somewhere to be when she hears their names announced over the pavilion speakers.

“What was that” Christen asks a little thrown off from hearing their names.

“Talent Show” Tobin smiles slyly as she wipes Ellie’s face off and taking their coats off before making their way up to the stage at the front of the pavillion. Christen is sitting in her place stunned. Tobin hadn’t mentioned this at all to her and she was extremely curious as to what the two of them could possibly be doing when Tobin’s mom speaks up.

“Oh you should hear the two of them Christen, they’ve been practicing a ton and they sound amazing.” But before she can ask her to elaborate the sound of a piano playing a jazzy sounding melody fills the pavillion and there sitting on the piano bench is Tobin. Next to the piano on a solitary stool is Ellie with a microphone on a stand fixed to just her height, swaying a little to the melody that Tobin is playing on the piano, the two of them smiling at each other when Tobin begins to sing. 

Christen can feel her smile causing her cheeks to ache before they’ve hardly started but when Ellie picks up her part of the song, her beautiful but childlike voice causes her to smile even bigger because the two of them are amazing. And she’s never heard this song but it’s a perfect duet for the two of them. The entire pavillion is captivated by the two of them singing together as they continue to look at each other singing together. Tobin beaming at Ellie like a proud parent when she takes over her own parts and the singing in the car makes even more sense to her now. They perform like they’re the only two in the world.

Tobin finishes the song off melodically and Ellie hops down to run over and hug her as the crowd stands to applaud them. They bow once and head down the steps off the side of the stage back towards the table where they were sitting before. 

“Christen did you hear us?” Ellie asks excitedly as her grandparents praise her for how amazing she was. 

“I did hear you, you guys sounded amazing, Tobin I had no idea you guys were doing that.”

“We were going to tell you but DH here wanted to surprise you”

Christen smiles at the child who is looking at her from across the table sitting in Tobin’s lap. 

“Did you like our surprise?” she asks a little more nervous than before.

“I loved it, Ellie”

She beams at Christen’s words before returning to ask Tobin about dessert. Watching the interaction between the two of them from across the table, she realizes something she already knew. Tobin wasn’t the same person like she said she was, she had changed, a lot actually. Tobin wasn’t just the goofy teenager she fell in love with when she was 15, or the driven and eager college student whose heart she had broken. She had grown up to be so much more than that and now she was this amazingly patient Mom, who was still making time to be the friend she always had been to Christen despite everything. Tobin flashes her a smile across the table at her and Ellie share a piece of pumpkin pie. 

For the first time though, the feeling she has in her chest doesn’t make her want to run, or bail. So she smiles back and the moment seems insignificant but they both know, things have changed between them. 

“I love Christmas!” Ellie shouts after stealing a bite of pie meant for Tobin and everyone at the tables laughs. 

Christen goes home with them holding up her end of the deal about helping assemble the Bike they picked out together for Ellie. She watches Tobin carry Ellie in from the car half asleep and put her to bed. 

Christen pours them drinks in the kitchen while Tobin finishes their bedtime routine not wanting to start on their assembly project without her. When she resurfaces she meets her in the living room handing her the drink. She watches as Tobin slips over to some device next to the tv and suddenly christmas music is playing softly thought the room. 

“Thanks for coming with us tonight, Chris. It meant a lot to Ellie, and me, it meant a lot to both of us.”

“Of course, I would have been upset had I missed that amazing performance”

“Yeah, that was Ellie’s idea too. They announced it on the radio just after Halloween and she got so excited we spent hours going through christmas songs, she picked that one. I don’t think she realizes how perfect it was for us. But we practiced a lot and she never once complained. Gosh she was so excited, I think I was the only one who was nervous”

“You guys did amazing, nothing to be nervous about.”

“Everything about her makes me nervous.” Tobin admits sitting down on the couch with her drink between her hands and Christen can tell by the pensive look on her face that this was important for her to get out. “I know nothing about being a parent and I am so thankful to have my parents so close because sometimes my mom steps in and I think, I wouldn’t have known to do or say that. I don’t want to fail her you know? I just want her to be happy and healthy and I want her to know she is loved.”

“Tobin, that’s all that matters. I think anyway, I’m not a parent but I’ve watched you with her and I think you are an amazing parent. You make her feel important, and loved, and she is the happiest child I have ever met. She is so intelligent and caring, and maybe she is inherently like that, but I choose to believe she is like that because that is how you are raising her to be”

She lets a tear escape and wipes it quickly from her cheek thanking Christen for saying the right thing without even realizing it. She does her best to turn their attention back to the task at hand and not the deep conversation she felt like they were headed into. It was Christmas after all, it was meant to be light and cheerful. 

Forty five minutes into attempting to assemble the bike and Tobin huffs and throws herself back on to the floor giving up as Christen tries to continue to decipher the directions. “I give up I need another drink” she pulls herself up off the floor as the other woman tries again to put the chain wheel on they had been fighting with for awhile now. 

“You know, most stores actually assemble the bikes for you if you ask” Christen speaks up enough for Tobin to hear her in the kitchen but not enough to wake up the sleeping child. 

Tobin pokes her head out from the cupboard she was looking in. “You are shitting me right?”

“Nope, did you really not know? I thought you were just being your stubborn self, or trying to get me to spend more time with you” she says the last part more under her breath but she doesn’t realize that Tobin is standing right behind her again until she leans down next to Christen’s head.

“It was definitely the last one” She whispers sending chills down Chritens back but she quickly shake it off when she realizes she finally got the gear in the right place.

“Got it!”

“Actually I take it back, I knew you would be able to put this thing together better than me” Tobin gives her a knowing smile.

“Yeah whatever, if you wanted to spend time with me though, you could have just asked”

“Is that all it takes these days? I just have to ask. If I had known it was that easy I would have been certain to take up all your free time.”

“You do take up all my free time” Christen says matter of factly. “Seriously Tobin, I have been with you and Ellie everyday after work since the day I hit my head. I’m not complaining, I’m just saying I don’t know how much more time you want to spend with me”

“All of it” she replies quickly but her tone is lower and Christen looks up to see that her eyes have darkened a little. She feels herself gulp uncomfortably. 

“Tobin”

“Chris” Tobin feels breathless and she doesn’t know what to do or say next but the air between them has changed and she knows what she wants to do. She wants to lean over and close the distance between them.

“I finished the bike” Christen whispers biting her lips trying not to laugh knowing where this was going and knowing exactly what she was doing throwing Tobin completely off. She hears her groan and roll over to reach to grab the bow she bought to attach to the handle bars. She places it to the front of the basket attached.

“She is going to have to ride this bike until she is 18, I am never assembling another bike as long as I live. But that is the last of her presents and my first year as Santa Claus is done.”

“I think you did a pretty decent job, or I did anyway”

“I’ll pay you to be Santa next year” Tobin says from her spot sitting up against the couch on the floor now having moved away from where they had been sitting in the middle of the living room.

“I’ll accept the offer but I draw the line at a white beard and red suit”

“You drive a hard bargain, my dear” Tobin pulls her down next to her after Christen put away the tools they used. She wraps her arms around her shoulders and sips on her drink while ‘Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” start to play as they look at the tree, and the presents surrounding it. 

“Can I tell you a secret”

“Sure”

“Ellie and I got you a few presents”

“Tobin! I didn’t get you guys anything...”

“Don’t worry about it, it was mostly her. We would be out and she would say something like “Toby, don’t you think Christen would love this?” and I can’t argue with that kid when she calls me Toby. So I just said ``yes''

“Now I’m scared to know what you got me”

“Ahh don’t be, the kid has good taste.”

“Can I tell you a secret too? I did kind of get you something. Well Ellie asked me to help you get something. She admitted that she already went shopping with your mom but she wanted her and I to get you something, the two of us”

“When did this happen? That kid loves scheming...” Tobin is confused as to when the two of them could have possibly come up with it. 

“The night I came over to watch a movie with you guys, you got up to get us popcorn and your mom came down to talk to you, she moved over to my side of the couch and asked me to help her with something. You’re right that kid is hard to say no to.”

“You’ve known her for like two weeks and she already has you wrapped around her finger” Tobin is smug about it but she doesn’t expect the response she gets.

“She gets that from you”

Christen has her head leaning into Tobin’s shoulder now and Tobin can’t help but turn her head and place a lingering kiss to the woman’s head. “Should it scare me how normal this feels, Tobin?”

She can’t see her face but Tobin is certain by the way she says her name that she is holding back tears. So Tobin leans back and places her hand under her chin lifting her head up until their eyes meet. “I think it just feels like coming home, Chris” she leans forward and does the one thing she had spent weeks, years wanting to do again. She kisses Christen softly and feels her reciprocate, placing a hand to the side of her face. 

Christen pulls away slightly looking into Hazel eyes that look back at her full of love.

“Home” 

“Home” Tobin nods leaning back in. 

****

“TOBY ITS CHRISTMAS” Ellie yells as she jumps onto Tobin’s bed. Tobin would be freaking out except that Christen had managed to set her alarm perfectly, having woken up a few minutes ago, slipping out of the bed before Ellie could find them in bed together. She was waiting in the living room for them as Tobin is being pulled into the room eagerly. She plops down onto the couch taking a cup of coffee Christen offers her and moves so that Christen can cuddle into her as Ellie walks around deciding on which one to open first. Tobin’s parents have joined them in the basement bringing a few presents of their own down with them.

Ellie picks one for Christen first. Excited for her to open it. It’s a Christmas sweater with a reindeer on it and when Christen looks up at the child she can tell she is waiting for a reaction. 

“Ellie Drew did you pick this out all by yourself? I love it”

The child beams and Christen pulls it on over the tee shirt Tobin gave her to sleep in.

“Hey Christen” 

“Yeah Ellie?

“I like when you call me Ellie Drew”

Christen can’t help but smile back at the child who had been so simply honest with her. She liked calling her Ellie Drew too….

They take turns opening presents and Tobin has to remind her that the bike is only for riding outside. There is one present left under the tree after they make all their rounds and Tobin realizes it must be the one that Christen helped her with because she hasn’t opened anything from the two of them yet. Ellie looks nervous and Christen gives her a little encouragement. 

“I’m going to be honest, I was a little nervous about this but I couldn’t tell her no” Christen whispers to Tobin so no one else can hear and Tobin grabs her hand squeezing it reassuring her. 

Tobin takes the present and opens it smiling at her child who is standing a few feet from her pulling at the hem of her pajama shirt nervously.

Tobin smiles when she pulls the wrapping off. It’s a photo they took together a few days ago when there was a fresh blanket of snow on the ground. Ellie asked for Christen to come over to go sledding with them, Christen obliged and Tobin’s mom had them pose together in front of the snowman, or attempted snowman, they had built. It’s framed in a thick white wood frame that was obviously decorated by the child. This time when Tobin reads it though, she doesn’t quite choke up like the first time. 

_ Mommy, Eleanor Drew, Christen Press  _

Tobin laughs a little at the fact that she had spelled Christens full name. 

“Do you like it, Mommy?” Ellie asks in just a little over a whisper but the gasps in the room are audible and it scares the child a little before Tobin reaches for her and pulls her in holding her telling her how much she loves it. They are both shedding a few tears whispering a few I love you’s, while the other three adults in the room wipe away their own silent tears. 

“This is the second best present in the whole world Eleanor Drew, and do you want to know what the first is?” 

Ellie is in her lap but leaning back enough to look at Tobin fully. 

“The best Christmas present is getting to spend every single day with you” 

The child wraps her arms around her neck again. 

Tobin’s mom speaks up before anyone can start crying again asking if anyone was ready for breakfast. They all head upstairs, Tobin and Christen trailing behind last. 

“Chris, there are so many things I want to say but right now I don’t want to cry again so I just want to say thank you. That meant the world to me and I know you helped her with that before we started whatever this is before us” Tobin gestures between the two of them but Christen pulls her in by her shirt, giving her a hug. 

“I’ve got a lot to make up for Tobin, but you have always been my best friend, you always will be. I never stopped being in love with you and I don’t think there will ever come a day where I’m not in love with you.”

It hit her like a ton of bricks. The realization that this was inevitable. Tobin knew that herself, but she realizes Christen knew it too, it’s why she broke off her engagement. Not because it was her fiance who was in love with her best friend. But because Christen was still in love with  _ her _ . 

“I love you so much, Christen”

Before she can kiss her though Ellie yells from the top of the stairs. 

“We should join them”

As they walk up the stairs Ellie tells them to stop right in the doorway holding up a polaroid camera she had gotten from Tobin’s parents for Christmas. 

“Toby, wait right there!” 

“Okay?” Tobin says confused looking at her mom who points to something above her head.

_ Mistletoe _

Her parents and her child had certainly orchestrated this somehow. Without knowing, they  _ knew _ . 

“Toby kiss her, already!”

Before Tobin can lean all the way in though she whispers into Christen’s lips.

“Were you apart of this too?”

“Baby, I am just as surprised as you are” Christen says before closing the distance between them. 

“Merry Christmas, Tobs.”

“Merry Christmas, Chris”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.


End file.
